Is she really 4?

I'm still kind of in shock. My baby girl is 4. Cuddling in my arms is now snuggling up on the couch and holding princesses. Sweet toothless grins are now happy laughing mouths with a full set of baby teeth. Soft plush toys have been replaced with larger than life dolls and a full family of Barbies. The tub, once an oasis of squeezie things is now a sea of mermaids, fishies and swim things. 

Four years ago, I was in a hospital bed, full of innocence in what this sweet little baby girl would be for us. My worries of when to nurse, who was changing her diaper and where were her diapers consumed us, as they do for new parents. We couldn't look past the next day, let alone four years from then.

Kendall Elyse South, June 16, 2008

Yet, look at us now. A few gray hairs later, along with a myriad of scars, bumps and bruises, we're still keeping up. I look at Kendall's newborn pictures, her month old pictures and even some tough pictures of when we found out she had a heart defect and our trip and her surgery at MUSC. I look at her now and see how she has grown. She is more beautiful than I ever thought possible and I know my own heart will need mending if I ever have to let her go, which I pray is never. 

I also think about my friends and family. Those who were there for us then, are still with us today. Though I may not talk or see everyone as much as I would like, they remain in my heart and many times, on my mind. The bonds we share have left a permanent mark. I fall back on those bonds many times.

So yeah. Kendall is 4. She may know how to potty by herself and figure out all of our mobile devices, but she's still our baby. She's still that little miracle that we keep trying to understand. And while I want to speed up that learning process, I also want to hit pause a few times as well.

Kendall Elyse South, June 15, 2012

My heart2heart is this. Learn and love. Keep trying to figure out what will make the ones you love happy. Learn those patterns. And as a dear friend reminds me, "rinse and repeat." 

Happy Birthday my dear sweet Kendall. You may feel like you're all grown up with your barbies and books, but you'll still be our little ladybug who gives us hope in miracles. Love you baby!!! 

This song, Angel by your Side, gives me some inspiration this evening as I think about those around us who are angels, and for those we can be angels to. I truly feel that God has blessed us with many angels, on earth and Above, that have given our life a true meaning.